Monday, August 16, 2010

? ? ? Home Sweet Home ? ? ?

It's a funny thing being home. In so many ways it's a huge comfort. Being back in the state, city, and home that has given me so many great memories. Being surrounded by the family and friends that have given my life so much love and happiness. There's something about being home that just gives your heart that warm fuzzy feeling.

It is also strange coming back into my childhood with a bouncing baby boy on my hip. Being away during the pregnancy and early days of little man's life we never got a chance to gradually ease into being a mom around my family. It was amazingly wonderful seeing my child face light up with sheer joy at the sight of my sisters. Watching them with him truly gives my heart happiness it hasn't felt in a very long time. My grandparents,  Little Man's Great-Grandparents are my refuge. They were there for me when my mom couldn't by and seeing him tucked in safely between the two of them puts my restless heart at ease.

I can not wait until we are back here full time. Being able to have them surround him in the love that I grew up in will truly complete this chapter of my life. In the mean time, We are working on cherishing every ounce of Texas that we have left. Making sure to seize the moments that God sends our way.

Now, my friends, it's time for some yummy Dunkin' Donuts Coffee (which you can't get in Texas) and soaking up some NJ sunshine.

Adios Mis Amigos,

Thursday, August 5, 2010

You wanna go where everybody knows your name (daa daa daa daa dumm dumm)

I'm going home. In exactly 6 days my feet will touch NJ soil and I am thrilled. I haven't been home since October of last year and I have been home sick ever since. Especially with the birth of my first born child, the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. I am beyond words excited to be back in my comfort zone, the place where everything is comfy cozy and everybody knows me. Most importantly everyone will get to meet little man.

My family is the equivilent to the crazy Greek family featured in My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Except we aren't Greek, we are just a crazy family of white folks. We are loud, nosy, and always having gatherings of at least 20 of us. And I love every second of it.

My grandparents, little man's Great Grand Parents will be meeting little man for the first time. These two folks took over in so many aspects of my life. My dad bailed early in my life and my mom was busy working crazy hours trying to support 3 babies and herself. So my grandparents attended all of our major life functions. My grandfather is a voice of reason in the chaos that is my family. He will and always has been my favorite person. I can not wait for his arms to wrap up and snuggle my precious baby boy the way that he did so many times when I needed him. And my grandmother. ahhh the pure joy that her face will bring is immeasurable!!

And then my little sisters. The 2nd loves of my life. Will be meeting their nephew for the very first time. The "baby" of us 6 girls is getting her first dose of "babyness" ever so that should be interesting. And the other two will be the best little Aunties little man could ever ask for.

So . . . . . . the blog will be quiet for a while. I've got lots of hugs, kisses, and visits to catch up on but wanted to share this moment of excitement and anticipation before it all begins :o)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Don't cry over burnt tortillas . . . or something like that

Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that my life would end up the way it has. Not that it isn't absolutely perfect . . . just never thought I'd be here.

I have always considered myself a very easy going, mellow kind of spirit. Just a go-with-the-flow kind of gal. I used to love flying by the seat of my pants, not a plan in sight and loving every second of it.

I don't know if its pregnancy, hormones, being a mom, or just a new phase of life I'm in. . . .but I'm learning that I am a complete control freak now. I want things done a certain way, in a certain order, and apparently I'm the only one who thinks that this is how it's supposed to be.

I think that my years as a nanny comes into play, because I feel like I have seen all different sorts of parenting. Some good, some bad, some I swore I would never do, and some I have taken and adapted into our lives. But I'm quickly learning that I'm a bit of a freak and need to learn when to let go.

I'm not an alchoholic by any means, and I know that the serenity prayer is not just for the boozers, but I was reading through my email and came across the reminder today. . . .

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference. 

In my quest for awesome domesticity I have been really REALLY trying to be a great mom, domestic goddess, and wife. I have taken on the approach that this is my job. My full time, 24/7, means of employment. My boss- Little Man. While he is pretty needy, I can not imagine a better pay check then at the end of my "shift" (which never ends but we'll say bedtime for laughs) I get to snuggle with this precious ball of cuteness. If I do nothing more in life then raise an amazing, God fearing, loving, compassionate Man I will consider my life a success. 

If Little man is the boss, I would consider hubs perhaps the VP. While he is not calling the shots, he and I are partners in this crazy thing we are calling wedlock. He doesn't require much, clean clothes and some food to put in his mouth. (even that is negotiable and he is such a trooper while I attempt to learn how to cook). After raising an amazing Man my second mark of success in this world will be to survive marriage. I'm not giving up on "happily ever after" I'm simply trying to be real. Marriage is a buttload of work. It takes effort and committment every single day. Yes I would love to be like the couple out of the notebook and pass on to eternity snuggled up with my hubs in our bed, but I also know that life is tough, marriage is rough, but that when two people are committed to making it work FOREVER . . . you can survive marriage . . . and maybe even end up happy when it's all said and done. 

The moral of this story. I put tortillas in the oven yesterday in my attempt to make yummy home-made tortilla chips. . . . little man started to get fussy, and before I knew it the kitchen, dining room, and family room were filled with nasty burnt food smells. 

So scrapped that and we ended up with an entirely different meal. My normal control freak would have been pissed that I forgot, annoyed with the lingering burnt tortilla smell, and frustrated with the situation . . . instead I swung the windows and doors open and took little man for a walk outside while the house was de-stink-ified :o) 

Adios Mis Amigos,