Monday, May 31, 2010

My own Personal Sanity Ambassador

This afternoon I am convinced that my little man is an angel sent directly from heaven. I swear I'm not one of "those moms" that thinks that there kid is absolutely perfect in every way . . . (I know he is) seriously though . . . .

He has been sent directly from the Big Man Upstairs (God). His mission is pure and simple. Keep me sane, keep me humble, keep me focused on what really matters in life. This is done through a variety of ways, but mainly he keeps me completely out of my own way. 

This morning I awoke after only getting a few hours of shut eye.(thanks to ridiculous sleep issues) His internal alarm clock is pretty precise and is turning out to be down to the minute. I laid in bed, hearing him fuss, hoping and praying that he would settle back down and allow me to catch a few more minutes of sleep. No such luck . . . the full on crying began. . . .my last attempt at staying in bed was wishful thinking that hubs would get up and sneak out quietly from the room . . . ha.

Instead I get an "babe, the baby is awake". ..  I know he's awake silly man...I was waiting for you to get him. My last straw was going to the bathroom before getting little man . . . thinking that now that hubs is obviously awake, he'll surely get him and then I can sneak from the bathroom back under my sheets. Again . . . I'm wrong. . . . the day continues much like this . . .. I am not trying to avoid my child . . . but simply in one of those "funky" moods that is screaming for some peace and quiet, alone time.

Throughout the day, at the precise moment that I am about to snap, say something witchy, or act rudely little man whips me back into focus and out of the witchy woman that was over taking my mind.

Seriously I can not count how many times his amazing smile, adorable laugh, or general cuteness saved me from saying, doing, and even sometimes thinking some horrible things today. (okay not thinking, I still thought everything  I wanted to say or do, but I should get some credit for not actually doing them)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Siesta Sundays

Today is an emotional day for me. Not really sure why, I am sure its hormones and the craziness that is the balancing act of my life. My heart is missing my family back home in New Jersey. We recently lost our family dog Toby. He was an awesome dog. The first real "family" pet we had. Sure we had guine pigs,, bunny rabbits, gecko's . . . but Toby was the first pet that we all shared. We each went through different ownership periods with him. But most definitely my little sister C. is the animal lover in our family. . . my all time favorite memory is her curling up in Toby's crate because she was convinced he was lonely. It is how I will forever remember Toby and one of the million reasons why I love my little sister C. We love you Toby. . . thanks for being an amazing pup!!!

Adios Mis Amigos,

Saturday, May 29, 2010

thank you insomnia

Thanks to my bff Insomnia I have managed to mess around with this awesome digital scrap booking website... and had some fun redesigning a crafty blog design... definitely a great outlet for creativity and wonderful to pass the time until I am able to fall asleep into never never land :o)

let me know your thoughts

Adios Mis Amigos,

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Wordless wednesday

Okay not so much wordless ... but definitely a picture :o)Little man finally got the memo about enjoying car rides... he used to scream like bloody murder from the second his bum hit the seat until we are arrived at our destination. . . . . now ... (so as long as he is fed, dry, and "happy") he is a good road tripper.... he finally fell asleep the other day in the car... I just kept driving ... cherishing the moment that we were both finally happy in the car

Adios Mis Amigos,

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Tackle it Tuesday

Tuesdays Tackle It day.... ugh... where to start . . . . .seriously, let me think. . . . . .

. . . . . . .

 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Okay so I've made lists like a crazy woman since moving, decided that if my life is going to be in any kind of order, I've gotta start checking it off one by one.

I have gotten so list crazy that I need a list for my lists.... ridiculous!!!!

My own person list is the focus for today.... I have a few things that seriously need attention....

1: was to get my "relax, rejuvinate, recharge, and study/work space" set up because today I start school ! I'm all set to go so that is one thing with a big old check mark next to it...

2. Little man should be napping in his room during the day if there is ever a chance of me being okay with him sleeping in there some night during his life time ... but honestly... I just love having him close to me.... I would probably end up sleeping on the floor in his room if he wasn't in here with us .. so ... that will wait... moving that over to the "get around to it sometime" list

3.  Started the low carb/low suger/ cut the crap out of my life diet today... went to the store, bought lots of stuff...lets see how long this one lasts . .  . I really am committed to loosing weight, and more importantly getting healthy .. . . so... we'll see how that goes

4. Ahh and I also have decided that after little man goes to sleep I am done ... clocking out... no more "work" for me... I shall use that time as "ME TIME" to do whatever the heck I want... but what that doesn't mean is laundry, dishes, bottles, sweeping, mopping, dusting. . . . everyone clocks out and I need to also!!!

So... this is my tackle it Tuesday. .. . anything your tackling today???

Adios Mis Amigos,

Monday, May 24, 2010

Its a new day. . . a new week. . . we are starting fresh

I could not be happier that this week is a great week of beginnings. . .

#1: I am starting school again ! I'm 27 years old and have never known what I wanted to do with my life. I still don't but figure it's time to start getting my act together... being a mom and all :o) I'm going to get my certification for Medical Transcription . . . I know I know ... nothing more exciting then listening to Dr's notes and typing them up . . . but ... it's going to give me a career that I can do from home... which is the most important thing to me since little man entered my world.

#2: Along with this . . . I am having my mother in law come to the house to watch little man . . . two days a week... sometimes three... but I am just so thankful for the help !!!

#3:I'm working on being more consistent with my blogging . . . . I want to get back into a weekly routine... part of this is concquering my healthy goals once and for all.. again.. being a mom... I want to be a positive example to my child...

#4: I'm working on getting a graphic design blog up and running ... hoping to get a little extra cash flow generated for doing something that I love doing ... its my "creative outlet"

pretty excited... Let the week begin :o)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Sunday, May 23, 2010

ohhh for the love of pooop

I love my son... absolutely love him to pieces... he is by far the cutest little man I have ever known.... but are there just some times I swear he knows exactly what he has done and is cracking up on the inside with the craziness he puts me through . . .. today was one of those days.

A little back story, the hubs car has been crapped out in the driveway for a week so we have been housebound. I've got to say I was little bit more then excited to get out and about. Something about knowing that you are stuck at home makes me cranky.It has however proven useful in getting done all the chores around the house.

Our first stop... Marshals.... right on the top of my list of fun... I love the thrill of hunting and digging through piles to find that perfect duvet cover, amazingly cute coffee mugs, and great deals on adorable clothes for little man. I carefully planned little man's bottle, diaper change and we were off. Hoping and praying that his nap would coincide with my strolling and trolling through bargain land. He did great, slept through the entire baby, bedding, and housewares. It was just as I was entering my shoe heaven that I began to smell "THE SMELL".

He was happily playing away in his car seat so I figured let me try to at least finish up shoes and then we'll head out. . . I fly through shoes, finding an absolutely adorable pair of wedge sandals. . . and he is happy and smiling away. . . I press my luck and try to check active wear since I'm starting this week on my "get my body back" schedule. . . the smell wafts up again and I do a leg lift (mom's you know what I'm talking about). . .I peak in and see that he has in fact decided that mommy's shopping adventure was the perfect time to drop a load. . . . I'm torn.... this is my first time out in weeks .... first time shopping for me in 6 months ..... I decide I'm going to smother ourselves in purell hand sanitizer and risk the bathroom stall..... I wait in line.. (of course there is a line) and after 10 minutes its finally our turn, I enter the stall and am sweetly surprised at the cleanliness of the bathroom... THANK GOD!!! but much to my dismay there is no changing station!!!! UGGH ...

First of all Marshals my love .... you have never let me down until today... how are you not going to address the needs of your mommy shoppers and supply us with a place to change our little poopy pants..... I walk out and the lady at the counter, obviously seeing the sadness in my face informs me that they have a family changing room that has a long table that I could use as a changing station... although she could have mentioned that 10 minutes ago before I stood in line, I was thrilled to know that I didn't need to abandoned my shopping cart of goodies to go change little man. . . .so off we go to the dressing rooms... the smell is now getting worse and little man is straining..... GREAT... the attendant sends us in... apparently its much more common place then I knew, using a dressing room as a changing diapers room ... I begin to feel warmth spreading up his back..... I stare down at little man as if to say .... "how dare you" .... and he just smiles and grins back at me....

You know your a mom when . . . . . you are up to your elbows in a poopy diaper in the dressing room of Marshalls

Adios Mi Amigos,

Thursday, May 20, 2010

3 months .... and 3 days (a little behind on the times)

Three months . . . seriously... three months. Amazed at how this little teeny tiny 6 pound 10 ounce bundle of cuteness has completely taken over our hearts, our house, and our lives forever.

Last night the hubs was strangely sentimental. He started looking through our birth day pictures and the subsequent pictures.. I have to admit... I have been that crazy mom that labels her sons pictures by the week. We have folders that are complete up to 12 weeks. 12 weeks is when the reality hit that its too much work... and the time and hours are few and fleeting... now I'm lucky if I take a picture a week instead of filling up each week with hundreds... I'm also rounding his age out to the months now... those weeks were confusing me and all those around me :o)

Realizing that we are three months into this whole parenting/motherhood journey. I laid in bed as my insomnia took hold and started reflecting to myself. It is absolutely amazing the transformation a person's life undergoes when they bring a child into their world. My "top three" lessons I've learned in the last three months.....

#1: You can't spoil a baby... a baby can never be held too much, snuggled too often, kissed too many times, or "wear" him too long. I have learned that baby's crave attachment. They need it in order to feel safe and secure. He is truly the happiest, most content baby I have ever laid my eyes on. Sure he has his fussy moments, went through a little colic stretch that was fixed with the right formula. . . but for the most part, he cries when needs something, food, sleep, a new diaper. If he is fed, rested, and dry in the tush... he is happy.

#2: Get the hubs involved ASAP. It's hard for the guy to feel connected to a little, wiggly, breakable newborn. It was my instinct to hover over hubs anytime he was doing anything for the baby. That mama bear "protecting" her young thing. He would get easily scared, overwhelmed, or frustrated and I would swoop in and rescue the baby.... the reality is ... Hubs and baby would be fine, they need to figure each other out. Now . . .at three months . . . hubs is learning how to put him to sleep, soothe him when he is upset... and they are really bonding in a way that completely melts my heart.                                                                                               (this is hubs hairy arm fyi)

  #3: this has been the lesson I've been learning since the second he popped out from down below... but often loose sight of it... its so easy to second guess yourself, get caught up in what other people say..... trusting my gut. No one knows him better then I do. No one can tell me what is best for him. Sure lots of people have great suggestions and tips and tricks that worked for them and their little ones.... but I have to stick to my gut. If something doesn't feel right... isn't a good fit... it isn't for us... everyone wants to offer their help, suggestions and ideas... but it doesn't mean that you have to go against what you feel is right...after all.. at 2 a.m. he's all yours
It's so funny how nothing about this little guy was planned. . . how I spent a better part of the first 3 months of my pregnancy freaking out, worrying that I wouldn't be able to handle it. . . wondering why in the world God would send this into my life now?

I am amazed that this was exactly what I needed (just didn't know it)

Adios Mi Amigos,

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

The Man Den . . . seriously???

As many of you faithful followers know (and I appreciate you I really do) we recently moved..... I apologize in advance for the venting . . . I just need to get it out in the open... and know that you, friends, will support me... because your awesome and we have to stick together :o)

We left a three bedroom two and a half bath to go to a new three bedroom two bath. . . .somewhere in the move I lost a guest bedroom and gained a Man Den. The said "Man Den" is pink... pink walls and under no circumstances is it to be used as a guest bedroom. He has it completely done up with a 50" t.v. . . . two "media" chairs (from a consignment shop) and even went shopping for a plant and some "art" for the walls. . . SERIOUSLY?!?!?! a plant... are you serious?????? and now apparently its our "media room" where I am supposed to spend my evenings with him.... never mind the fact that we have a gorgeous family room that I love with an amazing new sofa set that is rediculously comfortable... I'm supposed to curl up in one of those chairs and "bond" with him..... grrrrr

One of the great perks of our new place is that its a single story. . .which means that his mother can come and stay over as often as she wants (I love his mom and absolutely LOVE having her come and visit) ... however now she has no bed to sleep on . .. HUBS suggestion.... put a queen size bed in the already jam packed nursery . ..  so his mom can "sleep with the baby" HA!!!!! first of all.. there is no room for a bed in there... .secondly... sure his mom may love sleeping with the baby.. but what about anyone else that comes to visit...

then this got me thinking . . . where is my room??? my "sanctuary" as he calls it. . . my place to "decompress" after a stressful day ??? apparently its the whole rest of the house.... riiiiiiiight

so .... I'm putting on the gloves and standing my ground . . . the guest bed WILL be going in that room ... come hell or high water .... just have to figure out how the heck to get it in there????

in the mean time . . . my "space" is done . . .its a 5 ft by 3ft section of our master bedroom.... complete with inspiration wall and all of my favorite things :o) its not a room... but its mine ... all mine

Adios Mi Amigos,

Monday, May 17, 2010

Back to my Quest for Domesticity

Okay friends, I don't know what I was thinking trying to tackle any more items before the move. Let's be serious, it was all I could do to manage to keep me and little man functioning while trying to pack and move. But now we are settled in at the new place. . . well .... at least "set up" there are still boxes in each room that needs to be unpacked. . . but I'm going to tackle a few boxes each day and hopefully we'll be unpacked by next weekend :o)

So I'm feeling ready and willing to get back on track to being a super star domestic master. i've decided to make myself a little weekly checklist. . . figuring that if I have one "task" to complete along with the daily grind I should be able to keep and maintain a semi clean house, organized life, and happy family .... RIGHT???

Any other stay at home mom's that schedule out there weeks like this . . . curious what everyone's "plan" is

Adios Mi Amigos,

Saturday, May 15, 2010

A Quiet, Peaceful, Saturday Morning

The house is silent. Seriously silent. So new and profound that I am finding myself uncomfortable with the lack of noise. There is normally a T.V. on, dogs barking, a baby crying. But I've got to say . . . . .I LIKE LOVE IT !!!  This brings me back to the "old days". You know, before baby, heck before marriage. The moments when it was just me, my coffee and a Saturday full of possibilities. A day when I didn't do anything I didn't want to do. . . a late breakfast with my sisters, a shopping trip when I plan to buy nothing but look at everything. . . an afternoon mani and pedi.... and an evening out with friends..... If only I truly cherished those days when I had them. . . seriously soaked up every moment.

Fast forward 3 years, I don't have a day of possibilities. I pretty much have my life planned out to the T in 4 hour increments for the foreseeable future. (the ammount of time between little man's feedings) I wouldn't trade being a mom for anything. I love my little man and am so thankful for him and this "phase" of life. But it sure would be nice if this phase included just an ounce of "mental health time".

This brings me to a realization. In the soon to be 3 months that I have been a mom. I have had not had more then 45 minutes of alone time. And by alone time, I mean running out to Walmart or the grocery store by myself. That was my big 45 minute solo trip. . . Walmart!!!  Even when little man is napping I'm listening for him. When I run to store, I'm hurrying through so that I can make it back before he wakes up so the hubs doesn't have to deal with a fussy baby.  I can never fully check out of my life. My grandfather calls these mental health days. A day when he packs up his bicycle and heads down the shore. A day that is left with nothing but his thoughts, a magazine to read, and what he wants to fill his time. I'm not looking for a whole day . . .maybe just an hour or two. A span of time, when I know that little man is safe, happy, and secure. When I am out and about, by myself, doing anything I want. A pedicure, a stroll around Barns and Noble sipping on my favorite hot beverage....... sitting on a patio reading a book that has nothing to do with pregnancy, childbirth, or motherhood. (all I've read in the past year)

Maybe someday . . . .until then.... little man is awake, needs a bottle and my day begins

Adios Mi Amigos,

Friday, May 14, 2010

The Big 6-0..... really????

Well my friends,  We did it... and are you ready..... it took us two trips... 6 hours... and another full day of back and forth trips with two cars.... HA!!! my hubs cracks me up... little man did great, he was a total trooper and put up with crazy chaos, noise, and lack of naps.... it is absolutely amazing to me how much crap we have accumulated and it got the point where everything and it's mom is in our garage.. figuring I would get the house the way I want it.. and worry about all of that junk later... or go out and scrounge around as I need it... so much for parking my car in the garage :o(

on a super bright side, we got internet up and I returned to blogging to find myself having 60 followers :o) unbelievable... I was always saying my goal was 20 awesome readers... and you guys ROCK!!! So not only did I hit the big 6-0 I got my first award.. . . still learning the ropes of how this works.... but I think it goes something like this .....



Award Rules: 
1. Thank the person who gave you this award.
2. Share 10 things about yourself
3. Pass the award along to 10 bloggers who you have recently discovered and who you think are worthy of the award.
4. Contact the bloggers you've picked and let them know about the award.

Rule 1:
I recieved the award from Laina over at Reflections of an Navy Wife
I love her bright and cheery outlook on motherhood and being an spouse in the military.
Rule 2:
1. I was born in Florida, grew up in New Jersey and am currently living in Texas
2. I am a coffee addict, I preset my pot every night so its hot and fresh before my feet hit the floor in the morning.
3.My husband I will be married for 3 years this September.
4. Our plan was to wait 5 years for children.
5.I gave birth to our son February 18th :o)
6.Being a mom is by far the most amazing thing I have ever done
7. I am currently studying to become a Medical Transcription after being a nanny for over 9 years.
8. I have 5 sisters who are my best friends
9. I know that every mom thinks their child is amazing, but seriously, my son is the greatest gift I have ever been given.
10. I'm an absolutely horrible speller... and were it not for spell check it would be a thousand times worse!!!

Rule 3:
My award goes to . . . . . she is a new wife and mom ... LOVE HER love her histerical point of view on life and motherhood !

okay I know its supposed to be 10 blogs, but I'm a mother of a 2 month old... i'm lucky to be able to shower daily :o) these are the ones I keep up with on a regular basis :o) 

Adios Mi Amigos,

Thursday, May 6, 2010

It's moving day . . . errr weekend.... errr week

It cracks me up that the hubs honestly believed our entire lives, house, and little man could be moved in a day. Seriously, he thought 5 hours would be enough to load, unload, unpack and get "settled". I love the man to death, but come on !!!

So this is the week, a massive panic came over me Saturday afternoon while we were at his sisters house getting her moved/unpacked. I realized I was absolutely no where near ready. So since Sunday A.M. we have been packing, organizing, sorting and thank GOD throwing away. It is absolutely AMAZING how much crap we have accumulated. Not too mention how much baggage one little kid can have. (and he's only 11 weeks old!!!!)

Every room is boxes, mess and madness. There used to be some sense of order. But I am now to the point where everything is just getting tossed in boxes. So as long as it makes it to the new house I'll be happy.

I'm guessing the next few days are going to be insane.... so wish me luck, hopefully little man will survive :o) and his mommy won't go crazy in the process.

It's Adios Mi Amigos,

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

A change will do you good

I am the girl that is never happy with her hair. I have been every shade, from organge (by accident) red, blond, black, and everything in between. If its blonde, it's too much maintentence and I want it brunette (closer to my roots) so I don't have to color it every couple of weeks.  When its brown, I get bored and need to spice it up. If its short I wish I could just throw it back in a pony tale, if its in a pony tale, I wish I could chop it all off and have something short and sassy. Why is it that I can never be happy with what I have??? When will I find "the look". You know those ladies that have kept their hair the same way for years. . . I just don't know how they do it. . . how do they not get bored and want to change it up ?? I don't know if I will ever have a look that sticks for more then a few months. In the mean time, I'm off to google short, sassy, blond hairstyles.

Adios Mi Amigos,

It's a beautiful morning . . . its a beautiful day

Today was one of those days that I will cherish forever. I heard my little man laugh for the first time. It was a true blue belly laugh. My mother in law always say that when babies smile or laugh and you don't know why it's because they are seeing angels. Who knows but we were taking a bath, and I was in the process of washing his cute little backside. Out came the laugh. I flipped him over so I could look into his face, and he looked over my head and laughed again. Absolutely amazing. He went on to laugh again, while I was scrubbing his tummy and under his neck. . . guess he's going to be one ticklish little guy

Feeling really honored and blessed to have been given such an amazing gift. Thankful that God knew better then to listen to my plan for my life and give me exactly what I needed!!!

Adios Mi Amigos,

Monday, May 3, 2010

What doesn't kill you

I can't help but feel like if the saying was really true. . . I'd be super woman by now. Don't get me wrong, I love my life. I feel honored and blessed to be able to be home in the little man. I am so thankful that my husband works as hard as he does to provide so that I have been home and soaking up every second of being with him.But between feedings, diapers, laundry, dishes, cleaning, and then trying to manage to organize and pack the house in the few fleeting moments the little man allows me to put him down. I am honestly surprised I haven't had a complete melt down by now. My husband was able to get more done in the 2 hours he devoted to packing then I have gotten done in the 2 weeks I have been trying to pack.

I know that we do always come out stronger on the other side. I am sure that there are lessons to learn, character traits to build . .. blah... blah blah  . . I'm just ready for that side... ready for the side that is calm, quiet and sedate. The side that doesn't have the stress, emotions, and chaos that this side has. I'm ready to just be in "that place". Praying that the other side will come quickly !!!!

Enough about all of this.. there is a beautiful gorgeous sleeping baby to gaze upon. . . and that my friends is what its all about  

Adios Mi Amigos,