Saturday, July 31, 2010

Goodness Abounds

Today was the first day in . . . . I can't remember how long, that I had my car and was venturing out and about town with little man. I was having a blast, we went to Target (obviously first stop on my freedom tour) TJ Maxx, and Home Goods. While stumbling through my wallet for my debit card I stumbled across a gift card that my sister had snuck into my wallet while visit little man. I insisted she keep it and get herself something fun. She reminded me that I had just managed to grow an entire human being and then evict all 6 pounds 10ounces out of my whoo haaah and that I was in need of a purchase. That was a good 4 months ago. Obviously Kohls was our next stop.

Little man was long overdue for a nap, but told my self that he would surely crash out as soon as we got into the store ( I mean obviously he knows how important shopping is to his mama right?) wrong!!!

He is doing this new thing where he whines and almost sings in an horribly high pitch baby song. Obviously I had to share.... This is the noise that we are waking up to in the morning. Falling asleep to in the evening. And the sound that he chooses to belt out at the most random of times. Of course the entire community of Kohls shoppers needed to hear him!!!

It finally got to the point where he was making a scene and I finally caved and realized that I was totally "THAT MOM" the one that thinks if she ignores the sounds her child is making they will stop. Instead of ruining everyone else's shopping expierence I ditched my cart of items on a display self (super cute flip flops for $2.97, a car seat toy for little man 50% off for $3.00) and bolted for the door.

An older couple was walking out of the store at the same time and the woman just smiled and said "I remember being there, cherish these moments, they will be gone before you know it" and handed me a piece of paper. She explained that they wouldn't be able to use it and didn't want it to go to waste. And that next time I go shopping I should put it towards something great for myself. Without even looking at the paper I shoved it in my pocket and loaded up little man and his squeeling and headed home. I figured it was a coupon and hopefully I'd be able to make it back soon.

While sitting at a stop light I remembered the "coupon" and grabbed it and started to read. It was Kohls Cash. With an available balance of $40.00. This woman, a complete stranger had just given me $40.00 store credit . . . . I felt my eyes well up with tears. I can't even tell you the last time I went and spent $40.00  without thinking. We are a one income family while I'm going to school and every penny counts. I think that the total in my shopping cart would have been about $7.00 and she had just given me $40.00 to spend "on something fun for myself"

I can not wait for the day, that hubs and I are in a better financial situation and I can bless someone the way that she blessed me today!

Adios Mis Amigos,

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Thankful Thursday

Gratitude creates it's own attitude. And I have decided in my quest for pure domestic awesomeness that each and every Thursday I'm keeping a running total of things I'm thankful for. . . 7 things for 7 days :o) adding up to 365 when all is said and done.

We have a lot to be thankful for today, and I've been a bit busy and consumed but wanted to take a moment to simply basque in the blessings and  protection that we have been given.

1. Hubs was given a clean bill of health by his cardiologist. PTL!!!
2. He survived the heart catherization, (guys and sickness GOSH!!!) and they found absolutely nothing wrong with him. He's clean as a whistle :o)
3. God has provided for us yet again, and despite having to miss work for almost a week while he recovers, his bonus will kick in the same week that this pay period pays out, meaning what could have been over a week of un-payed sick time will not even be felt. 
4. Little Man is completely healthy, cold free and back to his amazing super cute adorable little cutie pah tutie self.
5. I'm finally starting to take care of myself and have gotten caught up on all of my missed and long over due dr's appointments.
6. God continues to provide each and every day. I have not worked since December and we are not only having all of our needs met, but have mullah left to spare !!!
7. I am thankful, this week especially, for God's complete and utter protection of my husband. It hit me really deeply that I could potentially loose him far before I'm ready. I know I post alot about my frustations and irritations, but I truly don't know what I would do without him. I am thankful that God has given me someone to laugh with, to cry with, someone to protect and provide with me, and my best friend.

Adios Mis Amigos,

I will survive . . . .I will survive

Thank goodness men don't have to squeeze cantelopes out of their private parts. The world would surely come to an end.

Hubs is recovering from a minor procedure related to his cardiologist and I'm up to my eye balls in listening to the whining hearing him groan and complain self analyzing himself with horrible completely impossible illness taking amazing care of my wonderful husband. I'm completely out of energy, patience, and have nothing left to give. Thank goodness his mom came over and is helping with the baby, meals, and preserving my sanity. Lord help me if he ever has anything seriously wrong !!!!

Adios Mis Amigos,

Monday, July 26, 2010

Making our own baby food

I have been back and forth trying to figure out what we were going to do about baby food. I am by no means one of those healthy, organic only, food freak kind of mom. I just want to do my best to make sure he's got the best options for our family. I found some really great options. It sucks that the organic veggies are so much more expensive, but one that I feel like, for right now, is the choice for us. Part of me was excited with the idea of doing all homemade organic baby food. But I'm not gonna lie, I was nervous about the work involved. It is so much easier to grab a bunch of jars from the baby food isle at our grocery store.Or so I thought. In just one hours time, I had made enough baby food to last at least 1 month. Here's what we did---

Our local grocery store is pretty good about stocking a good variety of organic fruits and vegs. I found some awesome green beans, zuchinni, carrots and sweet potatoes. Figured this was a good start on some staple foods.

I simply washed, dried, and chopped all of the veggies. For me it was easier to do everything at once, but since we are just starting out and not sure about any allergies, I was careful to not mix cutting boards, knives, and bowls. I put each one in about 1/4 inch of water and covered with a lid to let them steam down to a super soft texture.

Then I threw them in our little magic bullet blender. I love our magic bullet because I could use one container per veggie and not have to wash until the project was all done. They have generic versions that I have seen for less. But I am in love with this thing.

Once they were the right texture I poured them into ice cube trays and placed them in the freezer. I'm sure that there are difference size and kinds of ice cube trays. But figured that the ones we have were about 2 tbs. Figuring that as we are getting started one ice cube of green beans was a good serving size to get him used to them, check for allergies, and adjust to the new texture. As he grows, we'll just double up on the serving and two ice cubes are about the size of 1 gerber serving.

Adios Mis Amigos,

Friday, July 23, 2010

Freaking Friday . . . .

The past couple of weeks have been filled to the rim with Dr's appointments, scans, ultrasounds, and everything else . .. both hubs and myself have decided that it times for us to get healthy and part of that is catching up for the last 6 years of not seeing Dr's .. fun right ??? yea not so much! I'm beyond exhausted have a mountain of laundry but had a blast taking photo's of little man to document his 5 Month Birthday :o)  - first baby can you tell- I do really feel sorry for all subsequent children we may have, no one will be able to measure up to the documenting that this little guy has gotten :o)

 Showing mama's home town pride GO PHILLIES
 Our first trip to the E.R. little man was having problems breathing with his cold

My little thumb sucker


 How yummy is that face!!!

Adios Mis Amigos,

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

how not to screw up your kids ?

Here is the thing about baby makin' - it's no joke! But honestly other then eating right, getting rest, and not doing anything crazy, your body really takes care of the rest. That is what freaked me out about makin' a baybeh (baby)- it was completely out of my control. And the more I learn about myself, the more I learn I really am a control freak. I like to know what is happening, when it's happening, how it's happening. And once something is planned I HATE CHANGE!!! Nothing about my pregnancy was planned, but I read as much and as often as I could about ever single element of pregnancy. I felt as prepared as I could possibly be and really just took my prenatal vitamins and prayed like nobodies business. I knew that God sent this amazing little kidney bean into my uterus and that HE was the one that was going to help him grow into a healthy, amazing, chubby whubby little man.

Now motherhood on the other hand, is entirely 100% in my hands. Don't get me wrong, I'm not taking anything away from the big guy upstairs, I'm simply saying HE has entrusted me with this little man and I'm doing my best not to screw him up. It's up to me now, to protect him, keep him healthy, feed him, teach him, and all the rest that goes into being a mother. And that freaks me out too. I mean how many counseling sessions have I had that have involved my childhood. How many ways have all of us been forever impacted by things are parents have done or said.

I'm finding this an extremely heavy burden to bare. To breastfeed or formula feed. Feeling guilt and failure when breastfeeding didn't work out.  To vaccinate or not vaccinate. What if my little man is that one in a million that has some sort of awful reaction. To co-sleep or make my little guy cry it out. Will he become too dependent on us, is that even a bad thing. What I do now, according to all of the books and google Gods could very well make my precious amazing little man a very well adjusted, self confident, and amazing adult. Or it could very well turn him into the next creeper, loser of a man still living at home at the age of 42, or at the very least cost him an arm and a leg of therapy.

So here I sit, researching the heck out of the world wide web with things to do, not do, must do, shouldn't do and I finally came to the conclusion . . . there is no conclusion. So now we have started a therapy fund, right along side of his college fund. This way, if when we screw up, at least he won't have to go into debt to fix our mistakes :o)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Monday, July 19, 2010

Makes my Monday

Today's Makes my Monday is simple. 
With little man's first cold the past couple of days were Rough. (with a capital "R")

We have been standing in a steamed up bathroom, filling and refilling the humidifiers, and sucking the snot until there couldn't possibly be more snot to suck. My poor little baybeh!!! The thing that breaks my heart is that despite how bad you know he is feeling, he has been amazingly happy, smiley, and all around squishable.

I was given a humidifier at my baby shower and have absolutely fallen in love with it. It's a little on the pricey side, but unlike many others its completely 100% reachable in ever nook and crany. You don't have to worry about yucky mold or mildew getting in places you can't reach. and it's dishwasher safe. Once little man is through the worst of it I fully plan on sending the entire unit through a hot sanitizing cycle in our dishwasher.  It is programable according to how much humidity you want and quickly filled up our room in no time. We started out at 50% and last night we are up to 75% and it's doing the trick.

Once he got super congested we went out and bought a plug in vaporizer and it helped dramatically with his night time sleeping. No more wheezing and coughing which helped both baby and mama sleep like a champ.The refill packs were on sale, so we stocked up for next time.

Hope these help you guys should you ever find yourself in a boogie situation.


Adios Mis Amigos,

Sunday, July 18, 2010

i would IF i could but i can't

Can I just say how completely ecstatic I am right now. This moment right now is a rariety. It's a gorgeous Sunday afternoon and the house is silent. I have a soft Michael Buble music playing in the background. . . a yummy delicious candle burning on the mantle... sipping on a scrumptious cup of iced coffeee.. not sure if life gets any better then this moment.

Little man is crashed out. My poor little snot faced baby is exhausted from wheezing and huffing and puffing his little booogie face all morning. He's rolling now and that is all consuming. It's as if he has finished a marathon when he finally flops from back to tummy. I guess it's hard work flipping a whopping 14lbs :o) We are taking it easy today, hoping that a day at home, full of Vicks Vappo rub and saline nose spray will help him get over the hump of this nasty cold.

Hubs is crashed out next to him, after a rip roaring late night of playing his favorite PS2 game he needs to catch up on his sleep. Sometimes I do have two children. I kept telling him all night, "honey, you should get some sleep so your not too tired tomorrow" "five more minutes babe" . . . mmhmmm I fell asleep while he was playing in the other room, so Lord only knows what time he went to bed. Hence a nap was mandatory for him also.

So here I am . . . curled up on our couch, soft music playing in the background, a deliciously yummy candle burning and sipping on some iced coffee... haven't had a moment like this in who knows how long.. can we all just take a moment to enjoy it with me. . . . . .. . . . . ..  thanks that was wonderful :o)

Recently read a fellow mommy's blog and I've realized that my life is full of "if"....

I would be happy IF I was back in NJ. It's obviously impossible to be happy where God has put you?!?!? I would feel better IF I lost weight. But choose to sit on the couch and eat cheetos! I wouldn't be so depressed IF I had my family near by.... I have done nothing to attempt to build a community of friends here. I would loose weight IF I had an eliptical. (obviously you can't loose weight without one :o) I would join a gym IF we could afford it (again, it's impossible to just eat right and be active) I would be a better cook IF I took a cooking class ( I put no effort forth in the kitchen) it goes on and on and on. . . . .its a bunch of bull.

I don't want to be this kind of example to little man and am determined to be real, truthful, and honest with him, but more importantly honest with myself. No more excuses. And that my friends is a toughie.

I'm done beating around the bush with things. I am not going to say one thing when my heart is screaming something else. I am done trying to be whatever it is that I think people expect me to be.... it is what it is and we'll just have to deal with it ! 

It's time to loose weight and get healthy because I want to be around with him as long as possible. I want to see him graduate kindergarten, middle school, high school and college. I want to watch him learn how to crawl, walk, run, and ride a bike. That is my motivation . . . that is what I will remind myself of every day!

I will take responsibility for my happiness. I will do everything within my power to surround myself with things and people that encourage me, uplift me, and make my life better. More importantly people that don't drive me crazy :o) I will not get caught up in the drama, petty issues, or negativity that can so often enrapture me.

I will make a genuine effort in the kitchen.... seriously.... I'll try... that's the best I can shoot for.

I know that my heart, especially since having little man, longs to be close to my family. I am desperate for him to know my grandparents. To build amazing memories with them like I have. Their advancing age is a scary thing for me. They are the people that I just always believed would be there for me . . . forever. As time goes on, and they are beginning to slip into the "advancing senior citizen" age group, I don't want to waste another minute not being with them. I want my sisters to be his 2nd set of mom's. I want him to have amazing relationships with each and every one of them. I want my mom to enjoy raising a boy. Being a mom to 6 girls she has never gotten the satisfaction of "the boy" expierence. Something that I know will be nothing but good for her. I want my aunts, uncles, and cousins to surround him with the love that I have been surrounded with my entire life. It's very easy for me to sit and mope about them missing out on the best thing that has ever happened to me. What is harder is putting a plan in action. Doing everything within my power to get us back to NJ. And so it has begun, we have a count down timeline. We still have a few things that need to be completed here in San Antonio. .  but the hubs is on board and we are hoping and praying for doors to open up that will enable us to be home ! 

So it's not IF anymore!!!it's time for some serious NOW!

I will be happy NOW!
I will choose to feel better NOW!
I will start choosing the healthy choices NOW!
I will eat right, get active, and not waste another moment NOW!
I will kiss his chubby cheeks, blow raspberries on his naked tummy, snuggle him every chance I get NOW!
I will put a plan in action that will enable us to get back to NJ NOW
But I will make the most of the time we have left here in San Antonio and quit being so mopey NOW!

what are your if's ???? just curious if I'm the only one :o)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Colds Stink

Our poor little guy has his first cold, and while we thought it was getting better, Friday it came back with a vengeance and he is just so punky...... breaks my heart . . . we have been super busy and between walking, rocking, snot sucking, and trying to make him as comfy as possible I have nada left in me to attempt to write. .  . so I'm off to bed ... guessing tonight will be another sleepless night

Adios Mis Amigos,

Saturday Smiles

There is absolutely nothing in the world that warms my heart more then seeing my baby boy smile. There is something so cheesy when his eyes get all squished up, the rolls under his chin get even chubbier. . . and then out from the depths of his belly comes the most beautiful noise I will ever hear. . . .his laugh.

Adios Mis Amigos,

Friday, July 16, 2010

Freebie Friday

I wanna thank Ashleigh over at Thankfully Thrifty for the super sweet Freebie Friday Link . . . if you get a chance go and check out her site... I think you will be thankful for all of her thrifty tips :o)

Freebie Friday

Free Magazines

Adios Mis Amigos,

Deaths Waiting Room aka Cardiologist office

wow, sorry for the MIA but we have been super busy every day getting hubs caught up on all of his long over do Dr.'s appointments. Don't know about the men in your life but trying to get him out to any kind of medical appointment is like pulling teeth! I finally convinced him that since little man's arrival both of us need to be doing everything possible to be the healthiest parents we can be.

Yesterday and Today were spent with a bunch of different tests but I spare you the boring medical side and just share with you the sadness that consumed me . .. . this is a multi physician practice with over 20 dr's all working out of this one clinic, so you can imagine a waiting room full of 20-30 patience all waiting to be seen. I guess the scariness of something being wrong with your ticker makes you want company. There with mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, husbands and wives and all the mixtures in between. The majority of the patience were . . . well old folks. ... we are talking 70's and 80's and a few well past that . . . all shuffling along or being pushed in their wheel chairs. . . then there was hubs and I .... in our late twenties hanging out with the senior citizens club.

All were friendly and making conversation. We had Esther who was preparing for her triple bi-pass, Frank, Harold, and Walter all in after a heart attack. The list goes on and each and every one I envisioned having an amazing life story. Frank was a sassy little firecracker. Not ready to throw the towell in just yet. He made a point of flirting with the nurse at the check in station, and being fiesty when Harold mentioned he was from NYC. I had brought my laptop in an attempt to get our pictures organized and at the sight of a baby I was surrounded... everyone oooohing and ahhhing and I've gotta say it made my heart happy.

But it made me super reflective and even more insistent on making our lives count. On getting to the point where we are old and gray, sitting in the cardiologists and being able to oohh and ahh at some new young life.It also made me call my grandparents (little man's great-grandparents) and tell them how much I love them. How thankful I am that my family is healthy and active and not quite in the "death's waiting room" category. 

Adios Mis Amigos,

Smiling Saturday

Lately Saturdays have just been an extension of the work week. The hubs usually picks up overtime, leaving little man and I to tackle another day flying solo.

This Saturday we are going to the zooooooooo !!!!! All the stars aligned (hubs was off from work, friends have a family membership and got us in for free)  (imagine me smiling from ear to ear like a 2 year old) I have been begging pleading asking the hubs to go for a while now. I'm all about the zoo and I don't really know why. Always have been and probably always will be. I love being so close to animals that I would never see in real life. Being able to observe them up close and personal is just too cool for me.

Hopefully little man will share this love, if not, I'll force it on him and drag him along with me every chance I get I'll find other things we can share.But hopefully he'll love the zoo too :o)

Pictures to come as soon as I have time to syn and edit .... but yay for the zooo !!!

 Adios Mis Amigos,

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Tackle it Tuesday . . . .surviving

 ok first of all.. if this image is not the funniest thing I have seen all morning I don't know what is.... this is exactly how I feel!!! like a hot mess!!! I'll give her credit though at least her slippers, bra and undies match... I'm in a disarray of pajamas with dry crusty cereal (little man's breakfast), a tshirt with a healthy does of pukey (little mans morning bottle), and freezing cold feed cause the freaking dog chewed my slippers.

last night was the worst night sleep I have had since popping out little man. . . .I tossed and turned the entire night and when I finally did manage to fall asleep I would have some weird, scary, or twisted dream that startled me back to consciousness. . . .so my tackle it tuesday today is simple. . . .SURVIVE

my mother in law is here watching little man . . . today is supposed to be the day that I get massive ammounts of school work done, clean and tidy the house, write a few whitty sarcastic blog posts,  and get done all of little man's laundry.... well friends... it's nearly 12:15 and I've managed to have a cup of coffee and a bowl of cream of wheat, return 4 emails, and waste 30 minutes on facebook.... needless to say... much still left to do and zero energy to do it.

I'm going for a refill of coffee and praying that I will find some hidden burst of energy to at least get done the school stuff that needs to be completed today.. the rest can wait for another day (except little man is nearly out of burp clothes/pukey wipes) so perhaps school and a load of pukey wipes!

Adios Mis Amigos,

Monday, July 12, 2010

Makes my Monday

Today I'm beyond thrilled to be bringing you a site that I was introduced to yesterday. She has a freebie Friday  that is awesome! I just finished sending out my information for a good bunch of it. . . .can't wait till it starts arriving!!! I'll be show you what ends up in my mailbox :o)

Ashleigh over at Thankfully Thrifty  makes my Monday today because her blog inspires me to be a better blogger. To keep focused and keep on keeping on!

So if you get a chance, go check her out . . .  I think you'll love what you find!!!  Below is the freebie friday information.... enjoy ;o) 
Adios Mis Amigos,

Friday, July 9, 2010

Ohh to be you Little Man

Dear Little Man,

My precious baby boy, I pray that you will always realize how good you have it. You sleep when you want, eat when you want, and have your mommy and daddy wrapped around your finger. You truly are the happiest most content baby I have ever met. Sometimes I am just so jealous. Oh to be a baby again!!! I want a nap every 3 hours . . . I want to have someone snuggle me up not let me go . . . .I want to see the world as new and exciting . . . .Thank you for teaching your mommy that there really are few things that require stress and for showing me "the amazing" stuff each and every day ! 

Adios Mis Amigos,

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Handle with care.

WARNING: this post might make you wanna unfollow me... I swear I'm not a crazy depressed woman... just needed to vent and who else to talk about it with then the world wide web right??? Handle with care

I have been crazy wrapped up in my own issues the last couple of days/weeks.  It's just putting me in a general cranky pants mood. I'm not feeling creative or funny, and thus have nada to write . . . I am not myself, I have lost interest in the things that used to give me happiness and joy .. . and quite frankly I just wanna curl up in my bed and snuggle the day away with my little man. 

I have been feeling withdrawn and honestly shutting down to the outside world. Focusing any ounce of energy I have on fundamentally essential relationships (hubs and little man since they are the co-habitating) and praying to God that everyone else will understand once I resurface. I have had zero patience for any thing or anyone that comes along. I am just not myself. . . .and I don't like this person. 

I'm am ridiculously home sick. I miss my family more then I have words to explain. I am completely heartbroken that my entire family is missing out on the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. My grandparents have yet to kiss his amazing chubby cheeks. See his miraculous smile first hand. My younger sisters haven't gotten to hold him, squeeze his amazing chunky thighs or snuggle him while he is sleeping. It absolutely kills me. He is truly my miracle. My amazing gift from God and they are missing it. Every day he does something amazing and I look around at the empty house. It's just me and him. I am sad. Sad that these days will never be given back to us, and sad that the people that mean the most to me (besides my husband of course) are never going to know him like this.

I know, I know, go hop on a plane and quit your whining Baby Maker. But I H.A.T.E. HATE flying .... I normally have to dose up on anti motion sickness pills and anti anxiety pills (because of course every plane I fly on will be the one that crashes and burns in a fiery death trap) these knock me out on my booty for a good 4 hour flight. . . how I am supposed to be knocked out and take care of a 4 month old who will, with my luck, scream bloody murder the entire flight. . . .thus. . . my crappy pants mood...which is worse... braving the flight, not taking my happy pills, barfing while trying to handle a baby who is screaming bloody murder and getting to see my family, or sitting here, witching and moaning about how much I miss them.... mmmhmm I know.

It's just one of those days I suppose . . . .

Adios Mis Amigos,

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Hotter then heck

In an attempt to loose an ounce of chub a few extra pounds that have accumulated in various places that I can no longer stand I have decided to go walking every day with little man. It turns out to serve two purposes. 1.) gets my booty moving 2.) helps little man through his cranky time of day. The time that is too late for him to take another nap, and not early enough to go to bed for the night. We go out, get in a few laps around our quiet little neighborhood and then back in time for a bottle, bath and bed ... it's been wonderful.

Until lately when the Texas heat has kicked into full swing and I have had to push it back later and later in an attempt to not die of heat stroke. Kind of defeats the purpose if it's going to mess up little man's bottle and bed time but if we go any earlier we would literally both die of heat exhaustion (okay not literally but pretty sure we would be sweaty and gross and potentially suffocate from the humidity.)

  have never really been a summer person. Fall and spring are definitely my favorites... mostly because its awesome to be outdoors (which I love). Since moving to Texas I have missed having seasons. It literally goes from being a coolish 50-60 degrees to hotter then hell. (no I don't know how hot hell is.. but from what I've heard it's pretty toasty)

We are talking the kind of heat that as soon as you walk out the door you immediately start to perspire. I'm sure that I'm a whimp and not accustomed to it, because everyone here plans barbecues and get togethers in which they hang out side as if it's not 150 degrees (IN THE SHADE!!!!)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Let the Journey Begin

Today's the day, well today is prep day, tomorrow we start ..... but for real this time. Last time I tried the "loose the chubby" project I lasted all of 2 days because I really wasn't equipped with the right stuff. I didn't have the snacks prepared and so when the munchies called the potato chips answered. This time I'm taking the necessary precautions and completely emptying our house of all temptation... if there is nothing "yummy" to eat, we'll have no choice but to go for the healthy things.

I have been talking about it for about 2 months. I am tired of the clothes that used to fit, being snug, and quite frankly pissed that it has gotten to this point. I have always been a chubby girl, and I'm totally okay with it. I'm not looking to be a certain size or shape, I'm just tired of being blah. I want to be healthy, feel healthy, and I'm not gonna lie, look good. I still have a baby bump despite the fact that little man is going on 5 months old. It's time for some action!!

Hubs is on the boat too, he is ready to commit to a total lifestyle overhaul and quite frankly we have both gotten to an all time "bad" since being married for 3 years. It's so easy when your feeling loved and adored by your spouse to sit down with a bag of sour cream and onion chips (me) or a entire case of Oreo Cookies (him)

So tonight we are off to the grocery store, we are fully stocking up our fridge with yummy, healthy snacks and nutritious options ... I've spent the day ridding our house of the junk, everything from the freezer, fridge, and pantry are cleaned out of the crap.... so . . . here we go 

Adios Mis Amigos,

To cosleep or not to cosleep

Looks like a fairy tale right . .. baby sleeping peacefully while Mum and Dad look lovingly down at their new born. . . this was us and has been us for the past 4 months. . . .Never in a million years did I ever think that I would be "that mom" that keeps her child co sleeping . . . but alas... a life full of "never say never" moments and here we sit. Little man happily snoozing away in his little pack and play next to my bed. He's sleeping a consistent 12-14 hour nights without fail . . . hasn't woken up during the night in FOREVER.

I found myself in a near anxiety ridden moment when hubs mentioned that perhaps tonight was the night for him to start sleeping in his own room. SAY WHAT????? I gave him the obvious glare of questioning when he brought up too many points to mention here... mainly that we are going to end up with a huge problem the longer we let him get used to sleeping in here with us. . . . he went on and on and actually had to almost ready to commit to a trial run. (with me of course sleeping in little man's room)

Then the more I sat on the couch watching my fix of A&E's show Obsession. (the show deals with all sorts of mentally ill people. Hoarders, OCD  etc) I realized. . . . I couldn't do it . . . I am obsessed with sleeping with our bedroom door locked. .. . nothing crazy. I don't have to wash my hands 347 times a day or circle around the house checking every single light switch 234 times . . . I just like to and have always slept better with my bedroom door locked.  It's a stupid poorly productive habit I know. If someone is serious about breaking into our house and coming into our room, I'm pretty sure that little tiny lock could be busted if they blew strongly enough let alone gave a little bit of muscle.  So here I am envisioning said intruder coming and trying to break in and suddenly it dawned on me that the very same intruder would easily head to little man's room first and for sure kidnap him and we would be on the news begging and pleading for his safe return . .. . ohhhh Lord sign me up for an intervention now . .. .

Yes I know I'm crazy . . . I know that this will not happen . . . I know that he will sleep his ever loving heart out there in his own room, in his own crib and be perfectly fine . . .it's me that is a mess .

So I relocated our pack and play into our bedroom (he is quickly outgrowing his previous co sleeper (#1 reason on hubs list why he should start sleeping in his own room.) so problem solved :o) at least until I can get myself admitted to a crazy person hospital :o)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Monday, July 5, 2010

It's like magic in the sky

I love fireworks, in fact, love doesn't even cover it. There is just something so magical about the dark night sky being illuminated with pyrotechnics. I was a little nervous this year because I know that little man is super sensitive with loud noises. He freaks. My husbands laugh, the dogs barking, my sneezing, they all just scare the crap out of him. I'm sure that eventually his sensitivity to sound will get better, but for now, I really do try to keep things calm and quiet. I just figured that this year fireworks were out. I was okay with it, but then at a last change of plans we decided that if it got too loud for him, we could go sit in the car and he would be alright. So we drove over to our normal spot and it was BOMBARDED with people. There were cars lining the shoulder, the median, trucks pulled up on the curb. The parking lots were all packed and the sky was getting darker and darker. I was sure that we were going to be stuck watching the fireworks from the car while driving . . . we finally found a place to pull over and park where we were able to get a pretty good view.  and low and behold... little man LOVED IT . . .I am so sad that I didn't bring the camera to document the moment, a moment that I know will never come again. He watched in amazement as the sky lit up in a rainbow of colors. He loved the different shapes, colors, and just all around everything about it. I am so glad that we didn't miss that moment, and that I was able to share in one of many firsts.

Adios Mis Amigos,

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Happy 4th of July Folks

We have had a crazy busy weekend here at the Baby Maker's Casa. . .but I didn't want today to pass without doing a little "I LOVE MY COUNTRY" post . . . my family comes from a long line of Navy Folks, but beyond that we are just really proud of all the men and woman that serve to fight and protect our freedom.

Praying that everyone has an amazing fun and safe holiday .... Love this song and thought... what better then for today :o)

(The Angry American)

American girls and American guys, will always stand up and salute.
We'll always recognize, when we see ol' glory flying,
There's a lot of men dead,
So we can sleep in peace at night when we lay down our heads.
My daddy served in the army where he lost his right eye,
But he flew a flag out in our yard 'til the day that he died.
He wanted my mother, my brother, my sister and me.
To grow up and live happy in the land of the free.

Now this nation that I love is fallin' under attack.
A mighty sucker-punch came flying in from somewhere in the back.
Soon as we could see clearly through our big black eye,
Man, we lit up your world like the fourth of July.

Hey, Uncle Sam put your name at the top of his list,
And the Statue of Liberty started shaking her fist.
And the eagle will fly and it's gonna be hell,
When you hear Mother Freedom start ringing her bell.
And it'll feel like the whole wide world is raining down on you.
Ah, brought to you, courtesy of the red, white and blue.

Oh, justice will be served and the battle will rage:
This big dog will fight when you rattle his cage.
An' you'll be sorry that you messed with the U.S. of A.
'Cos we'll put a boot in your ass, it's the American way.

Adios Mis Amigos,

Friday, July 2, 2010

Goodness abounds

There is something about rainy days that turn me into this crazy introvert. I like to curl up on the couch, window curtains drawn wide open and watch the sights and sounds outside. The rain pouring down sends me into such a spirit of calm. Yes this typically induces a state of coma and lots of couch side naps... but now that I'm a mom, little man is not quite on board with my sleeping the day away quite yet, so he and I have been doing lots of snuggling. I held him a little longer before nap, snuggled him more throughout the day and just soaked up every ounce of his babyness.(yes it's a word, the state of being a baby of course)

I sat in our bedroom rocking this little guy and I am brought to tears with the amazing blessing that this child has been. And to think I almost missed out on the greatest joy my life has ever known, because I didn't want to have a child. I know that God brought him into my life for moments like these. Moments that teach me to be still and Know that He is God. This little amazing miracle makes me want to be the best mommy possible.

And it got me thinking, how many times do I let other people's opinions into my head. How often does it create self doubt and insecurities. Here's the thing . . . I love my son more then words, I am doing everything within my power to make his life the best it can possibly be. 

Sure I'm "that mom" that still has him sleeping next to me (in a co-sleeper not in my bed, I do have some willpower) despite the fact that he has been sleeping 12+ hours a night for months. Sure there are some that say he needs to be in his own room, in his crib, mainly just out of our room. But I just sleep better (when I'm able to sleep at all) knowing that he is there next to me. I am the one that freaks about leaving him for more then a few hours despite the fact that I know in my head he'll be completely fine. Yes, I need "me time" and I do get it, but I'm really just happiest when he is with me. I don't enjoy being away from him. If it were up to me I would take him everywhere. And I'm also 100% okay skipping out on things that he can't do yet. I have spent the past 26 years doing what I wanted to do. . . I'm okay with taking a year or two off from things.  Yes I'm "that mom" that would rather wear him in a baby sling to a crowded busy farmer's market then leave him at home. If I have a choice between going to the movies with friends, and leaving him at home or staying at home with him.... I would just rather stay home with him. I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything.

Here's my thoughts, he is only going to be in this phase of life for such a short amount of time, why rush it. There is going to come a time when he doesn't want to be held. When he no longer wants to be rocked to sleep. When he thinks I'm retarded and wouldn't be caught dead hanging out with me. Why rush it.  I'm not worried about him learning to hold his own bottle, he'll get around to it. I'm not rushing to start feeding him fruits and veggies, he'll get there. I'm cherishing the moments of stillness and am not really pushing him to be crawling or rolling over. Sure I want him to be healthy, I know how important landmarks are. He has tummy time, and we do our little exercises, I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm just not forcing it. So what if every other 5 month old is rolling over ... sitting on their own... eating fruits and veggies.... our little man just isn't ready and that is okay :o)   I have just seen so many people rushing these moments and I don't want to be one. I want to cherish every second.

That is my rainy day rant for today . . . thanks for humoring me :o)

Adios Mis Amigos,

Day 7: It's always okay to ask for help

Sometimes life is going to be too much. There are going to be things that come and go and things that sit and stay a while. Your mom has always been one to just do things. If I needed something done, I'd do it myself. No matter how much I could have used assistance. It's really hard for me to go to people and ask for help. It's almost impossible for me to admit that I can't do something. I don't know what it is, I just don't like doing it. It makes me feel like I failed. What I'm realizing is that God has placed amazing people in my life for a reason. Some offer wisdom, insight, and solid advice, while others offer a new perspective and a different way of thinking. God has given you an amazing family and surrounded you by people that love you more then words. Know that no matter what your situation there is always someone there for you. Know that it's okay to need help, its perfectly normal to not be able to do everything on your own. In fact its wonderful :o)

I pray you'll know that your mom and dad are always here for you, that whatever you need, we will do our very best to provide it for you. But beyond us, you have an amazing family that will always be there for you no matter what :o) you just have to ask

Adios Mis Amigos,

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Day 6: thankfulness

Today your mama was reminded ever so gently, okay, not gently at all but more of a huge giant slap in the face about being thankful.

First of all, you my love, are perfect. I'm not talking about cutie pah tootie, I'm talking about your health. You grew into an amazing and 100% perfect little man. You have 10 fingers, 10 toes, amazing eyes, ears, and everything else a baby should have. I was reminded today that this is not always the case and in fact was brought to tears at the mere "taking it for granted" feelings. Sure I thank God every single day for you. I thank him that you are healthy, happy, and all around amazing.

I am thankful that I am able to be home with you, that your daddy has a job when so many do not. I am thankful that we have food on the table, in the fridge and in the pantry. When so many do not know where their next meal will come from, we have food to spare.

I am thankful for amazing family that is here for us whenever we need them. Both your family here in Texas and around the country love you more then words and would do anything for you. At the drop of a hat at least 50 people would be surrounding us if we needed it, and that is something that not everyone has.

I pray that you will always be thankful, have a heart that is full of gratitude. That you will always be able to see the glass as half full and not half empty. See the sunny side of things and most importantly, know how completely blessed we are!

YouAdios Mis Amigos,